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Vegas Funny Quotes


"While I was busy hating Vegas, and hiding from Vegas, a funny thing happened. I grew to love Vegas." - J R Moehringer

"Funny is funny is funny." - Bob Newhart

"Hatred is not what Las Vegas is about." - Oscar Goodman

"I only ever play Vegas one night at a time." - Robin Williams

"Vegas will always be Vegas." - Debbie Reynolds

"What strikes me as funny about Elvis is that all the impersonators choose to do the Vegas Elvis, not the young, cool guy..." - Bill Hicks

"To me, 'X Factor' is like Vegas. Fake, twisted, but kind of wonderful. Maybe I'm sick, but I find the whole thing quite funny sometimes." - Charli Xcx

"It's funny how many people will come to Vegas to see your show where they might not come out to see you unless you come to their hometown." - Reba Mcentire

"The last time I appeared in Las Vegas, they were wearing hoop skirts and Davy Crockett hats, ... But they say 'What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.' And as far as fashion is concerned, that's a good thing." - Joan Rivers

"Carol Leifer is funny, really funny." - Chris Rock

"Not funny ha ha, funny weird" - Dean Koontz

"Everybody funny, now you funny too." - George Thorogood

"What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." - Jeff Candido

"Uncyclopedia isn't funny anymore." - Bernard Manning

"Cancer is always funny." - Jim Gaffigan

"Violence is not funny." - William Friedkin

"I'm really funny now." - Wanda Sykes

"[On Las Vegas:] I love that town. No clocks. No locks. No restrictions." - Marlene Dietrich

"Vegas is a celebration." - Jose Andres Puerta

"Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream" - Hunter S Thompson

"Las Vegas makes Reno seem like your friendly neighborhood grocery store." - Hunter S Thompson

"I pride myself on never using a cuss word on stage. Ever. I headline in Las Vegas every year, and this summer I am performing on an Alaskan cruise. Not too many comedians can pull that off. Funny thing is, my show doesn't change for Vegas." - Henry Cho

"I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown?" - Joe Pesci

"If I think something's funny, I think it's funny." - Ray Liotta

"I'm funny because I'm funny. And there's more to offer." - Brad Williams

"Prince Charles is so funny. So, so funny." - Joan Rivers

"If you try to be funny, you're not being funny." - John Gordon Sinclair

"If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny." - Alan King

"Baptists are only funny underwater." - Neil Simon

"Mental illness is not funny." - Philip K Dick

"Sometimes the future isn't funny." - Kerry Jackson

"Everybody's funny in different ways." - Colin Quinn

"Naked dudes are inherently funny." - Adam Devine

"I'm just not very funny." - Ira Glass

"Funny is when you're serious." - Harvey Korman

"I'm good at being funny." - Tom Stoppard

"Alec Baldwin is so funny." - Ryan Lochte

"Gene Wilder is so funny." - Kate Bush

"Some guys are more worried about their Vegas trip at the end of the season than playing the games, than playing every minute of the games. Quite frankly, I don't care about your Vegas trip right now." - Jean-Sebastien Giguere

"What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas - except the drone." - Mort Sahl

"Driving to Vegas is awesome... Driving home From Vegas sucks." - Brody Jenner

"He's a jokester, and that's funny, very funny. Ha-ha. Very funny." - Shaquille O'Neal

"Disneyland is Vegas for children." - Tom Waits

"I worry about Las Vegas schools. I hear in math, they only teach them to count to 21." - Rita Rudner

"Man, I really like Vegas." - Elvis Presley

"I'm not a comedian. I don't make things funny if they're not funny. I don't invent funny stuff." - Morgan Freeman

"Funny is the world I live in. You're funny, I'm interested. You're not funny, I'm not interested." - Jerry Seinfeld

"A rich man's joke is always funny." - T. E. Brown

"It's funny how things seem different, suddenly." - Kim Edwards

"I think absurdist humor is funny..." - Aziz Ansari

"Shakespeare - it's not funny. No matter how they try to make Shakespeare funny, when it's meant to be funny it's not funny." - Julie Walters

"Sometimes WRONG is worth the FUNNY!" - Billy Gardell

"It's funny how most activists are pacifists." - Craig Reucassel

"Funny how life messed with you." - Sarah Mlynowski

"She's as funny as a toothache" - Erma Bombeck

"Eureka!" (I found it!) but "That's funny..." - Isaac Asimov

"It's funny how things work out sometimes." - Anthony Horowitz

"Between funny and witty Falls the shadow" - Stephen Fry

"Funny people don't really laugh very much." - Tim Heidecker

"Well, I thought it was funny." - Stephen Colbert

"When in doubt, make funny faces." - Amy Poehler

"Everything's funny for God's sake. Everything." - Gloria Estefan

"Clever is the eunuch version of funny." - George Meyer

"I like kissing people because it's funny." - Casey Abrams

"I was born to be funny." - Buddy Hackett

"You gotta keep the funny intact." - Seth Macfarlane

"Private Perkins is a funny little codger." - George Henry Powell

"I like smart, funny, self-deprecating men." - Jules Asner

"I was shot from the funny gun." - Peter Deluise

"I grew up in a funny way." - Gordon Ramsay

"Chris Rock is a very funny man." - Willie Geist

"Being funny is everything to me." - Allison Jones

"I find teenage girls endlessly funny." - Chris Lilley

"What a sad business is being funny!" - Charlie Chaplin

"I think I've got a funny face." - Dominic West

"Inspiration strikes at very funny times." - Gillian Jacobs

"It's funny how most activists are pacifists." - Craig Bruce

"A rich man's joke is always funny." - Thomas Edward Brown

"Living with computers gives funny ideas." - Wim Crouwel

"Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny." - Frank Zappa

"My road trips have been to Vegas, but you know, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." - John Travolta

"What happens in Vegas, I'm telling everyone." - Dane Cook

"Las Vegas - my favorite desert mirage." - Val Saintsbury

"In Las Vegas, nothing ends very well." - Walter Wykes

"But Vegas is really my first home." - David Copperfield

"I like Vegas for its spontaneity." - Tony Curtis

"There is great food in Vegas." - Eric Ripert

"There's just no quiet in Vegas." - Barry Manilow

"I love performing in Las Vegas." - Holly Madison

"There are no funny lawyers - only funny people who made a career mistake." - Robert J. White

"If it bends, it's funny; if it breaks, it's not funny." - Kate O'Brien

"The Side Effects of Dying in Your Pants isn't really funny... Alright, it's a little funny." - John Green

"There are really funny alternative comics and really funny straight comics who write and perform traditionally." - David Cross

"I do think funny is like sexy. You're either funny and sexy, or you're not." - Christine Baranski

"The world is a funny paper read backwards. And that way it isn't so funny." - Tennessee Williams

"I am funny, but I'm not about funny... I'm about peace & justice." - Patch Adams

"It's not funny when you actually get shot, but afterwards, yeah, it's funny." - Curtis Jackson

"Ain't it funny what people say? Ain't it funny what people write?" - Rich Mullins

"Farts and poop are still funny and will always be funny." - Mark Hoppus

"I was always the funny guy. Everyone wants to hang out with the funny guy." - Brad Williams

"Being me is funny. I've made this weird character, and I think it's really funny." - Miley Cyrus

"I think the second you think that you're funny is when you stop being funny." - Mila Kunis

"I want to be funny, but it has to be a believable funny." - Kevin Hart

"I have no line. If I think it's funny, it's funny." - Joan Rivers

"I used to stutter really badly. Everybody thinks it's funny. And it's not funny. It's not." - Joe Biden

"Funny is funny." - Don Rickles

"I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too." - Wanda Sykes

"I guess funny people are attracted to funny people, and then you get comedy marriages." - Casey Wilson

"You can't be funny unless you're tragic, and you can't be tragic unless you're funny." - Elaine Stritch

"If it's inappropriate to write about, if there's nothing funny about it, then it's not funny." - Calvin Trillin

"You can't teach somebody how to be funny. You're either funny, or you ain't." - Denis Leary

"I grew up with an extremely funny dad, and my mom is super funny." - Paula Pell

"Thery're both iron, isn't that funny?" "Funny haha or funny strange?" James handed them back to me "Funny 'occult'" "Ah. Funny strange" James looked at me sternly, "Don't start that. I'm supposed to be the humorous one" - Maggie Stiefvater

"You know, Lincoln was funny. I don't think F.D.R. was very funny. But Lincoln was funny. Lincoln was really funny. But I think you should get elected first, and then show that you're funny." - Al Franken

"Some lucky people can be funny without half trying because they actually look funny, because acting funny is in their bones - fun as funny, not funny as crude slapstick." - F Sionil Jose

"Playboy strategically selected the Forum Shops at Caesars in Las Vegas to debut our first U.S. store because it is one of the most successful retail shopping destinations in the world. It is clear that Playboy and Las Vegas are a powerful match, presenting the chance for consumers and visitors to experience all of the glamour, sexiness, style and fun associated with both." - Christie Hefner

"I think men like the boobie shows. Vegas will always be Vegas." - Debbie Reynolds

"The problem is that we live in an uptight country. Why don't we just laugh at ourselves? We are funny. Gays are funny. Straights are funny. Women are funny. Men are funny. We are all funny, and we all do funny things. Let's laugh about it." - Bob Newhart

"Comedy should never be over-analysed. It's either funny or it isn't. There's a subtle difference between those who say funny things and those who say things funny." - Ken Dodd

"I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny. And when you're very, very happy, you're not very funny. You're just happy. I'd rather be damaged and funny." - Joan Rivers

"I don't do comedy. I think if a situation is funny you just play it for real and if it's funny, it's funny." - Morgan Freeman

"I love Las Vegas. I like that Las Vegas has everything. Everything and anything you want to do, you can do in Las Vegas." - Drew Carey

"Any artist who goes to Las Vegas is an idiot as far as I am concerned. Whoever goes to Las Vegas can stay in Las Vegas." - Chuck Close

"Bush, Blair and Rumsfeld; they are the funny trio." - Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf

"Kings and such are just as funny as politicians." - Theodore Roosevelt

"It's always funny to find what people's button is." - Seth Rogen

"Funny how a little politeness can change people's minds." - Sherman Alexie

"I love kids; I think they are fun and funny." - Courtney Thorne Smith

"Funny, now I can see, how looks can be deceiving." - Elvis Costello

"Sometimes I was so funny I couldn't stand myself." - Moira J. Moore

"Never underestimate the power of funny, it moves mountains." - James Patterson

"What's so funny 'bout peace, love, and world destruction?" - James Patterson

"Money is what makes a man act funny." - Eminem

"When you find something funny search it for hidden truth." - George Bernard Shaw

"People get starstruck when they meet me, it's quite funny." - Roger Lloyd-Pack

"Comedy, your funny bone, is formed in childhood." - Paul O'Grady

"Being funny is not the same as being happy." - Dana Gould

"You think you're funny? I think I'm adorable." - Eric Kripke

"Funny always makes the bad things go away." - Candace Bushnell

"Ladies pick funny things to be proud of." - Harper Lee

"Life's too damn funny for me to explain." - Don Marquis

"I have a funny process : it's called procrastination." - K. K. Barrett

"I'm so proud of my son for being so funny!" - Susan Boyle

"It's funny how one summer can change everything." - Sarah Dessen

"It's funny how one summer can change everything." - Sarah Dessen

"Sometimes I was so funny I could' stand myself." - Moira J. Moore

"If you can't be smart or funny, be brief." - J.A. Konrath

"I had no choice. Love does funny things to people." - Nicholas Sparks

"I'll teach you to laugh at something that's funny!" - Homer

"Mr. McCabe thinks that I am not serious but only funny, because Mr. McCabe thinks that funny is the opposite of serious. Funny is the opposite of not funny and nothing else." - Gilbert K Chesterton



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