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Santa Clause Quotes


"Santa was a fake." - Stephen Lawrence

"Or why you are wearing a picture of Santa Clause on you shirts, but-" "It's Herman Melville." - Daniel Handler

"God? Nope." requel's smile told me she was joking around to make this easier for me "santa clause? No again." - Claudia Gray

"Or why you are wearing a picture of Santa Clause on you shirts, but-" "It's Herman Melville." - Daniel Handler

"Harry Potter's like Santa Clause: something you can't see but wish was real so badly that you end up believing in it." - Emma Watson

"Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Clause. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who will?" - Jon Bon Jovi

"When Tim Allen made The Santa Clause, I thought that was a delightful film. It took a modern sensibility but layered onto it a kind of sentiment." - Leonard Maltin

"He who writes the Resolved Clause, wins the debate." - M. Stanton Evans

"Yes Virginia, There is a Santa Claus." - Francis Pharcellus Church

"Jesus is Santa Claus for Adults" - Christopher Hitchens

"The Santa Claus principle liquidates itself." - Ludwig Von Mises

"By the way, Santa just is white." - Megyn Kelly

"Be naughty - save Santa a trip." - Anonymous

"They'd boo Santa Claus, this mob." - Jack Gibson

"The greatest thing is not to believe in Santa Claus; it is to be Santa Claus." - Pat Boone

"An essential point in the social philosophy of interventionism is the existence of an inexhaustible fund which can be squeezed forever. The whole system of interventionism collapses when the fountain is drained off: The Santa Clause principle liquidates itself." - Ludwig Von Mises

"[Y]ou wonder why anyone would make the mistake of calling it the Commerce Clause instead of the 'Hey, you -can-do-whatever-you-feel-like Clause?" - Alex Kozinski

"The "takings" clause of the Fifth Amendment is for conservatives what the equal protection clause of the 14th is for liberals." - Michael Kinsley

"The takings clause of the Fifth Amendment is for conservatives what the equal protection clause of the 14th is for liberals." - Michael Kinsley

"The 'takings' clause of the Fifth Amendment is for conservatives what the equal protection clause of the 14th is for liberals." - Michael Kinsley

"There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus." - Bob Phillips

"There are three stages of a man's life: He believes in Santa Claus, he doesn't believe in Santa Claus, he is Santa Claus." - Anonymous

"Ultimately, I think the Equal Protection Clause does guarantee same-sex marriage in all fifty states." - Barack Obama

"[Did you] ever know a sincere emotion to express itself in a subordinate clause?" - Dorothy L Sayers

"The Due Process Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment stands, in my opinion, on its own bottom." - John Marshall Harlan II

"God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat." - H L Mencken

"It's like giving up a belief in Santa Claus." - Burton Malkiel

"I'm Santa Claus to these hoes without a reindeer." - Nicki Minaj

"I feel warm and reassured," I whispered. "He's like Santa." - Maureen Johnson

"I'm not going to make a present of Santa." - Sam Allardyce

"Like everyone in his right mind, I feared Santa Claus." - Annie Dillard

"Please be informed, there is a Santa Claus." - Jim Lovell

"The real Santa Claus is at the mall." - Daniel Handler

"I felt like I had just double-tapped Santa." - Jim Butcher

"I keep three hoes, But don't'call me Santa" - Nicki Minaj

"What kind of Christmas present would Jesus ask Santa for?" - Salman Rushdie

"Not everyone who sells Christmas trees believes in Santa Claus." - Matt Barr

"I'm the only one who still believes in Santa Claus!" - Edith Piaf

"All the world is happy when Santa Claus comes." - Maud Lindsay

"Let's be naughty and save Santa the trip." - Gary Allan

"I joined the board of the Santa Fe Institute." - Esther Dyson

"I believed in Santa Claus until I was 12!" - Danielle De Niese

"I live in a cabin in Santa Cruz." - Nell Newman

"We laughed about all the kids who believed in the Santa Clause myth and got nothing but a bunch of cheap plastic toys. 'Years from now, when all the junk they got is broken and long forgotten,' Dad said, ' you'll still have your stars." - Jeannette Walls

"When you sign with a major label there is no guarantee that they are going to release it either unless you have a guarantee clause or a marketing clause." - Michael Sweet

"The establishment clause was transformed from a shield for religion into a cover for the official sanctioning of religious tolerance." - Ralph E. Reed, Jr.

"The Commerce Clause has already been inflated so much that we basically can't do anything without the government's permission." - Alex Epstein

"Swaraj, without any qualifying clause, includes that which is better than the best one can conceive or have today." - Mahatma Gandhi

"A servant with this clause Makes drudgery divine; Who sweeps a room as forThy laws Makes it and th'action fine." - George Herbert

"Whenever you give someone a present or sing a holiday song, you're helping Santa Claus. To me, that's what Christmas is all about. Helping Santa Claus!" - Louis Sachar

"Our family was too strange and weird for even Santa Claus to come visit ... Santa, who was jolly - but, let's face it, he was also very judgmental." - Julia Sweeney

"Texas, to be respected must be polite. Santa Anna living, can be of incalculable benefit to Texas; Santa Anna dead, would just be another dead Mexican." - Sam Houston

"A man of fifty looks as old as Santa Claus to a girl of twenty." - William Feather

"Santa will be showing up with Rudolph the Red-Eyed Reindeer." - Conan O'Brien

"Being a superpower is like being a Santa Claus that everyone hates." - Jon Stewart

"I'm trying to get far away from [picturing God as] Gandalf or Santa Claus." - William P Young

"I stand with the Santa Barbara News-Press. How about you?" - Michelle Malkin

"This Christmas, every Christmas, Santa Claus is everywhere and Jesus is nowhere to be found." - Paul Park

"Aren't we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa." - Matt Groening

"Besides, the mhis that surrounded the compound could scramble anything from GPS to Santa Claus." - J.R. Ward

"Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live." - Dennis Miller

"Alas! How dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus." - Francis Pharcellus Church

"I seriously doubt that the Santa police do an underwear check." -Cora" - Sarah Dessen

"Santa cAme early this year! good things come to those who wait! ? rebelheart" - Madonna Ciccone

"The awkward moment when Santa accidentally leaves the price tag on your present." - Eddy Sims

"In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?" - Rush Limbaugh

"Dolph Ziggler reminds me of Santa; everywhere he goes he brings an old bag with him." - Jerry Lawler

"If Mitt Romney was Santa Claus, he would fire the reindeer and outsource the elves." - Ted Strickland

"It's called the Santa Claus effect; the holiday period is traditionally a strong cycle." - Andrew Barrett

"Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa." - Matt Groening

"Santa cAme early this year! good things come to those who wait! rebelheart" - Madonna Ciccone

"Rumors that the sun is out at Santa Ynez are without foundation," the radio said." - John Brunner

"I'm going to North Pole to help out Santa this year." - Jimmy Fallon

"I live in Santa Cruz. I moved here in 1974 and couldn't leave." - Ellen Bass

"I was born in Santa Monica but brought up abroad so I don't use English much." - Geraldine Chaplin

"I split my time between Santa Barbara and Aspen. I live on a pretty fast horse." - Kevin Costner

"You can't trick The Universe - it's like Santa Claus that way." - Tracy Mcmillan

"Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year." - Victor Borge

"More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good." - Linda Sunshine

"Most of the holiday movies I enjoy, like 'It's a Wonderful Life,' don't really involve Santa." - George Wendt

"I was probably nine or ten the first time I heard there was no Santa Claus." - Joe Nichols

"I use to believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and Tom Cruise too." - Barbara Bretton

"Dear Santa, I'm good at being naughty, I think that should count." - Unknown

"If Congress can regulate this under the Commerce Clause, then it can regulate virtually anything-and the Federal Government is no longer one of limited and enumerated powers." - Clarence Thomas

"The Establishment Clause prohibits government from making adherence to a religion relevant in any way to a person's standing in the political community." - Sandra Day O'Connor

"No clause in the Constitution could by any rule of construction be conceived to give to congress a power to disarm the people." - William Rawle

"I think I was about 30 before I realized that not every family talks about the presentment clause on a regular basis." - Mike Lee

"Use of a mentally ill person's involuntary confession is antithetical to the notion of fundamental fairness embodied in the due process clause." - William J. Brennan

"The Establishment Clause prohibits government from making adherence to a religion relevant in any way to a person's standing in the political community." - Sandra Day Oconnor

"A dependent clause (a sentence fragment set off by commas, dontcha know) helps you explore your story by moving you deeper into the sentence. It allows you to stop and think harder about what you've already written. Often the story you're looking for is inside the sentence. The dependent clause helps you uncover it." - Janet Fitch

"It wouldn't be fair to say that conservatives cherish property the way liberals cherish equality. But it would be fair to say that the takings clause is the conservatives' recipe for judicial activism just as they say liberals have misused the equal protection clause." - Michael Kinsley

"You remember when you were a kid growing up, and believed in Santa Claus? There's not much difference between Santa Claus and me today, you know. We're two overweight lovable guys that kids really enjoy." - Bobby Knight

"Growing up, Santa Claus would cover the presents with a white blanket, so when we'd wake up Christmas morning, we had to wait for my dad to do the big reveal of all the presents Santa brought." - Martina Mcbride

"The gift from my Secret Santa wasn't anything special. That makes me sad. I bet you anything that Mary Elizabeth is my Secret Santa because only she would give me socks." - Stephen Chbosky

"We have confused God with Santa Claus. And we believe that prayer means making a list of everything you don't have but want and trying to persuade God you deserve it. Now I'm sorry, that's not God, that's Santa Claus." - Harold S. Kushner

"Santa Barbara is my hood. I mean, it's not much of a hood, but it is definitely like my hood. I claim Santa Barbara like I claim my family. I'm going to be married and buried there." - Katy Perry

"Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist." - Francis Pharcellus Church

"If SANTA CLAUS came down the chimney in a f**king jogging suit, you wouldn't even know it was him." - Wayne Coyne

"So I've started wearing sweatpants to bed because I really don't need Santa seeing me in my underwear." - Jeff Kinney

"When you think about it, Alaska is also near the North Pole, so she must also be friends with Santa." - Jon Stewart

"Because I am still a little girl who believes in Santa and the tooth fairy and you." - Laurie Halse Anderson

"I keep 3 hos but don't call me Santa And I'm and I'm flyer than reindeers in winter" - Nicki Minaj

"Unwisely, Santa offered a teddy bear to James, unaware he had been mauled by a grizzly earlier this year." - Tim Burton

"God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time." - Bil Keane

"I thought you were all-seeing." All-knowing, not all-seeing!" he snapped. "I'm a God, not Santa Claus!" - Kelley Armstrong

"I know I'm 38 but I insist that santa claus exists and he raped my mother when I was 9." - Thom Yorke

"A born terror, a rebel without a pause... Ain't never had a good Christmas, so who is Santa Claus?" - Shyheim

"My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide." - Phyllis Diller

"We're not mad at God, just like atheists don't hate Santa or Unicorns, they're just not there!" - Hemant Mehta

"Like kids who only ever get socks for Christmas, but still believe with all their hearts in Santa." - Barbara Kingsolver

"Have you ever wanted to put on a Santa suit?" "I have always wanted to do that," said Carter gravely." - Richelle Mead

"Santa Fe is fun to visit, but property there will cost you an arm and a dillo." - Emo Philips

"You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap." - Jeff Foxworthy

"If the Pilgrims had landed in Santa Monica Bay rather than Boston, we'd have six states out here!" - Kevin Starr

"I will show you the way To Africa comes Santa Claus and before Paris stands Mickey Mouse." - Till Lindemann

"The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants." - John Andrew Holmes

"Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket." - Henny Youngman

"In the years since his murder, we have transformed King into a kind of innocuous black Santa Claus." - Timothy B. Tyson

"I put on weight like Santa Claus. I just get this belly that kind of extends out." - Christian Bale

"The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live." - George Carlin

"No, there are some location shoots in Vegas, maybe four trips a year. It's shot in Santa Clarita, CA." - George Eads

"I thought you were all-seeing." All-knowing, not all-seeing!" he snapped. "I'm a God, not Santa Claus!" - Kelley Armstrong

"Santa Fe is a great place which people don't get there often, but it's like a unique place." - Mick Ralphs

"I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark." - Dick Gregory

"The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing." - Steven Wright

"I'm from Santa Cruz in Northern California, and the 49ers were my dad and I's bonding time." - Marisa Miller

"I just discovered the Santa Monica flea market, every Sunday. I go weekly. There's a lot of interesting things there." - April Bowlby

"I never saw a department store Santa as a kid. My mother was afraid to take me." - Terry Zwigoff

"I love Santa Monica and Venice because I like the beach. I have a lot of friends in that area." - Denis Leary

"Nobody shoots at Santa Claus." - Samuel Butler

"The title of that great Christmas song was 'Boogie Woogie Santa Claus,' and no one ever heard of it." - Patti Page

"Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven." - H L Mencken

"Here comes Santa Claus! Here comes Santa Claus! Right down Santa Claus Lane!" - Gene Autry

"I wasn't Santa in Santa Jr., but I was Santa in Cancel Christmas." - Judd Nelson

"The Bill of Rights is a born rebel. It reeks with sedition. In every clause it shakes its fist in the face of constituted authority... It is the one guarantee of human freedom to the American people." - Frank I. Cobb

"With respect to public acknowledgment of religious belief, it is entirely clear from our nation's historical practices that the Establishment Clause permits this disregard of polytheists and believers in unconcerned deities, just as it permits the disregard of devout atheists." - Antonin Scalia

"He's got a rematch clause in his contract but I'm not sure if he's going to want to exercise that rematch but if he does, I'd happily oblige. I'll go over to Canada and give him another whooping." - Carl Froch

"In every treaty, insert a clause which can easily be violated, so that the entire agreement can be broken in case the interests of the State make it expedient to do so." - Louis Xiv

"Do not extort thy reasons from this clause, For that I woo, thou therefore hast no cause; But rather reason thus with reason fetter, Love sought is good, but given unsought is better." - William Shakespeare

"The Free Exercise Clause protects the individual from any coercive measure that encourages him toward one faith or creed, discourages him from another, or makes it prudent or desirable for him to select one and embrace it." - William O Douglas

"Approving some religious claims while deeming others unworthy of accommodation could be 'perceived as favoring one religion over another,' the very 'risk the [Constitution's] Establishment Clause was designed to preclude." - Ruth Bader Ginsburg

"For the past two centuries, those who do not prize freedom have chipped away at every major clause of our Constitution until today we face a crisis of great dimensions." - Ezra Taft Benson

"[Clause in her will:] It is my intention to make no provision herein for my son Christopher or my daughter Christina for reasons which are well known to them." - Joan Crawford

"The average politician goes through a sentence like a man exploring a disused mine shaft-blind, groping, timorous and in imminent danger of cracking his shins on a subordinate clause or a nasty bit of subjunctive." - Robertson Davies

"The Grecian's maxim would indeed be a sweeping clause in Literature; it would reduce many a giant to a pygmy; many a speech to a sentence; and many a folio to a primer." - Charles Caleb Colton

"Once Donald Trump takes the oath of office as president of the United States, the Emoluments Clause of the Constitution makes it clear that he cannot accept those favors." - Chuck Todd

"Every president since George Washington has respected this clause in the Constitution. We want to avoid that Constitutional potential crisis. And the way to do it is for Donald Trump - it`s not about him." - Chuck Todd

"I'm only introducing it because of a small sub-clause in an Official Charge that escaped my notice a year or two back. Unfortunately the author didn't forget. Like elephants, authors are - nothing contractual escapes them." - Jonathan Stroud

"A moral coward, you see, is simply someone who has read the fine print on the back of his Birth Certificate and seen the little clause which says You can't win." - Kyril Bonfiglioli

"Pulling a crystalline, cogent rule out of the murk of the court's First Amendment, public forum, and Establishment Clause doctrine is an act of creation too complicated for mere mortals." - Dahlia Lithwick



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