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Raccoons Quotes

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"Why is love easy? I do' know. And the raccoons do' say." - Robert Fulghum

"I'd gone heavy on the black eye makeup until raccoons and I could pass for cousins." - Jeaniene Frost

"Why is love easy? I don't know. And the raccoons don't say." - Robert Fulghum

"I'm not really scared of a lot of things. I'm scared of possums. And I'm scared of raccoons sometimes, it depends on how big it is - I'm scared of the smaller raccoons because the bigger ones are slower." - Vince Staples

"I"d gone heavy on the black eye makeup until raccoons and I could pass for cousins." - Jeaniene Frost

"We have a show tonight. I've never missed a show. Not even the time I had that virus they kept saying only raccoons get." - LIZ

"Raccoons don't need to do poppers in order to come while they're having anonymous same-sex interludes in a highway rest area." - Doug Stanhope

"I'm not enthused by these rap dudes. All in they videos, posin' half nude, with all of them tattoos, Til I blacken they eyes and have them lookin' like raccoons." - Trife Diesel

"I bet she woke up with her hair looking like something out of a Pantene commercial while little bluebirds circled around her head, and raccoons brought her breakfast or something." - Rachel Hawkins

"Some people are uncomfortable with the idea that humans belong to the same class of animals as cats and cows and raccoons. They're like the people who become successful and then don't want to be reminded of the old neighborhood." - Phil Donahue

"Nothing is more important than saving ... the Lions, Tigers, Giraffes, Elephants, Froggies, Turtles, Apes, Raccoons, Beetles, Ants, Sharks, Bears, and, of course, the Squirrels. The humans? The planet does not need humans." - James Lee

"I constantly watch 'The Simpsons' and an English cartoon called 'The Raccoons' and 'Gummi Bears.' I was obsessed with ninja films, and the 'Teenage Mutant Nina Turtles,' I used to love that as well." - Matt Smith

"The thing to remember about love affairs," says Simone, "is that they are all like having raccoons in your chimney." ... We have raccoons sometimes in our chimney," explains Simone. And once we tried to smoke them out. We lit a fire, knowing they were there, but we hoped the smoke would cause them to scurry out the top and never come back. Instead, they caught on fire and came crashing down into our living room, all charred and in flames and running madly around until they dropped dead." Simone swallows some wine. "Love affairs are like that," she says. "They are all like that." - Lorrie Moore

"Cookie had taken her daughter amber to school then walked the thirty-something feet to work earlier. Our business was on the second floor of Calamity's, my dad's bar, which sat right in front of our apartment building. The short commute was nice and rarely invloved rabid raccoons." - Darynda Jones

"I'm so hungry, comrade! It has been days since we ate those two raccoons!' 'I know comrade. I'm even beginning to wish we had some of your homemade quiche!' 'Oh comrade! Do you mean it?' 'Hey-Hey! None of that! If you ever tell anyone I said that, I'll deny it!" - Jeff Smith

"The raccoons, foxes, beavers, chinchillas, minks, rabbits, and yes, sometimes even dogs and cats that are killed for fur are not very different from your beloved dog or cat. They all have eyes, ears and hearts. They all experience pain when they are physically maimed. They shake with fear when they experience terror." - Jane Velezmitchell

"I grew up in New Hampshire. My closest neighbor was a mile away. The deer and the raccoons were my friends. So I would spend time walking through the woods, looking for the most beautiful tropical thing that can survive the winter in the woods in New Hampshire." - Steven Tyler

"I have an avocado tree at my place in Los Angeles - it's the smoother-skinned one, which tends to be a little stringy. Often the birds or raccoons get the avocados before I can harvest them. I have figs, too, which are great with prosciutto, of course. I have limes and lemons, which I use to make lemonade." - Kyle Maclachlan

"It is only now, these years later, that Rahel with adult hindsight recognized the sweetness of that gesture. A grown man entertaining three raccoons, treating them like real ladies. Instinctively colluding in the conspiracy of their fiction, taking care not to decimate it with adult carelessness. Or affection. It is after all so easy to shatter a story. To break a chain of thought. To ruin a fragment of a dream being carried around carefully like a piece of porcelain. To let it be, to travel with it, as Velutha did, is much the harder thing to do." - Arundhati Roy

"The problem ... is that we have run out of dinosaurs to form oil with. Scientists working for the Department of Energy have tried to form oil using other animals; they've piled thousands of tons of sand and Middle Eastern countries on top of cows, raccoons, haddock, laboratory rats, etc., but so far all they have managed to do is run up an enormous bulldozer-rental bill and anger a lot of Middle Eastern persons. None of the animals turned into oil, although most of the laboratory rats developed cancer." - Dave Barry



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