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Cactus Quotes

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"Adolescence is like cactus." - Anais Nin

"The Big Cactus. I will stick you." - Shaquille O'Neal

"Don't jack off a cactus, you'll only hurt your hand and the cactus' feelings" - Tre Cool

"Texas is a hell hole, man. Dirt, cactus, lizards, dirt, cactus, the Bush family..." - Christopher Titus

"People trample over flowers, yet only to embrace a cactus." - James Joyce

"What is the difference between a cactus and a conservative caucus? On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside." - John Diefenbaker

"I have learned the difference between a cactus and a caucus. On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside." - Mo Udall

"The world is full of cactus, but we don't have to sit on it" - Will Foley

"The Big Cactus... because if you come too close, you're gonna get stuck." - Shaquille O'Neal

"Hope is not a resting place but a starting point - a cactus, not a cushion" - H Jackson Brown Jr

"You know you're an Arizona native when you hug a cactus only once in your lifetime." - Nancy Dedera

"The world is full of cactus, but we don't have to sit on it." - Will Foley

"Reach for the stars, even if you have to stand on a cactus." - Susan Longacre

"Juno MacGuff: "Thanks a heap coyote ugly. This cactus-gram stings worse than your abandonment." - Diablo Cody

"Hope is not a resting place but a starting point - a cactus, not a cushion." - H Jackson Brown Jr

"I want my body to help fertilize the growth of a cactus or cliff rose or sagebrush or tree." - Doug Peacock

"I want my body to help fertilize the growth of a cactus or cliff rose or sagebrush or tree." - Edward Abbey

"I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert." - Demetri Martin

"Even from far away, I could see people being chased by hellhounds, burned at the stake, forced to run naked through cactus patches or listen to opera music." - Rick Riordan

"I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus." Saiman said dryly. "Thank you for reminding me." "Always happy to oblige." - Ilona Andrews

"Anyone can win a slam-dunk contest. The real Superman is dead. He was assassinated by Pat Riley. I'm the Big Cactus now and ready to roll again." - Shaquille O'Neal

"Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it." - Joyce Meyer

"Too much detail can bog down any story. Enough with the history of gunpowder, the geology of Hawaii, the processes of whaling, and cactus and tumbleweed." - Edward M Lerner

"You can't learn anything from saguaro cactus, from ocotillo. They are just passing through; their roots, their much heralded dormancy in the dry season, these are only illusions of permanence. They know even less than you do." - Barry Lopez

"In the middle ages, people took potions for their ailments. In the 19th century they took snake oil. Citizens of today's shiny, technological age are too modern for that. They take antioxidants and extract of cactus instead." - Charles Krauthammer

"You told us to leave you in the desert, because you planned to start a new life as cactus," Catarina said, her voice flat. "Then you conjured up tiny needles and threw them at us. With pinpoint accuracy." - Cassandra Clare

"I'm an observer of life. I like to watch people, and I like to watch cactus. I like to talk to mountains and communicate with my friends in the other spheres and dimensions." - Frederick Lenz

"I'm like the trunk of a cactus... I take in a dose of culture and time with friends, then I retreat and go live on it for awhile until I get thirsty again." - Nancy Horan

"I remember very clearly someone saying, 'Don't shake hands with the cactus,' and I thought, 'Well, why not? What could possibly go wrong?' Shaking hands is a friendly gesture." - Benedict Cumberbatch

"A whale is as unique as a cactus. But don't ask a whale to survive Death Valley. We all have special gifts. Where we use them and how determines whether we actually complete something." - Max De Pree

"Mexican cars are just going to be lazy, feckless, flatulent, overweight, leaning against a fence asleep looking at a cactus with a blanket with a hole in the middle on as a coat." - Richard Hammond

"Flailing and thrashing, Buttercup wept and tossed and paced and wept some more, and there have been three great cases of jealousy since David of Galilee was first afflicted with the emotion when he could no longer stand the fact that his neighbor Saul's cactus outshone his own. (Originally, jealousy pertained solely to plants, other people's cactus or ginkgoes, or, later, when there was grass, grass, which is why, even to this day, we say that someone is green with jealousy.) Buttercup's case rated a close fourth on the all-time list. It was a very long and very green night." - William Goldman

"Who wants to become a writer? And why? Because it's the answer to everything. ... It's the streaming reason for living. To note, to pin down, to build up, to create, to be astonished at nothing, to cherish the oddities, to let nothing go down the drain, to make something, to make a great flower out of life, even if it's a cactus." - Enid Bagnold

"Take the rose-most people think it very beautiful: I don't care for It at all. I prefer the cactus, for the simple reason that it has a more interesting personality. It has wonderfully adapted itself to its surroundings! It is the best illustration of the theory of evolution in plant life." - Charles Proteus Steinmetz

"The one thing that seems to be consistent through all my work that I like, and I experimented a lot, is the viewer is allowed to meditate on something that normally we don't stop and stare at, whether it's people or a cactus." - Richard Misrach

"Rearing three children is like growing a cactus, a gardenia, and a tubful of impatiens. Each needs varying amounts of water, sunlight and pruning. Were I to be absolutely fair, I would have to treat each child as if he or she were absolutely identical to the other siblings, and there would be no profit for anyone in that." - Phyllis Grissim-Theroux

"Take the rose-most people think it very beautiful: I do' care for It at all. I prefer the cactus, for the simple reason that it has a more interesting personality. It has wonderfully adapted itself to its surroundings! It is the best illustration of the theory of evolution in plant life." - Charles Proteus Steinmetz

"Many of the Huichols and North American peyotists claim that when one eats peyote, one is "tasting oneself: if the user is pure, this cactus is "sweet." Barbara Myerhoff, accompanying the Huichols during their 1965 and 1966 hunts, recorded that they urge new participants to "Chew it well. It is sweet, like tortillas." - Peter Stafford

"John flung himself into a pseudo-karate stance, one hand poised behind him and one in front, posed like a cartoon cactus. I thought for an odd moment he had moved his limbs so fast they had made that whoosh sound through air but then I realized John was making that sound with his mouth." - David Wong

"Isn't that why you have that gun mounted on the front? Or is it for other reasons, because I would've thought that a man with your powers would be past the urge to compensate." Barabas grinned. "I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus," Saiman said dryly. "Thank you for reminding me." "Always happy to oblige." - Ilona Andrews

"In the first place you can't see anything from a car; you've got to get out of the goddamned contraption and walk, better yet crawl, on hands and knees, over the sandstone and through the thornbush and cactus. When traces of blood begin to mark your trail you'll begin to see something, maybe. Probably not." - Edward Abbey

"These Germans seem an odd race, a mixture of clay and spirit - what with their beer-drinking and smoking, and their slow, stolid ways, you would think them perfectly earth; but ethereal fire is all the while working in them, and bursing out in most unexpected jets of poetry and sentiment, like blossoms on a cactus." - Harriet Beecher Stowe

"I think a good way to get into a movie is to show up where they're making the movie, then stick a big cactus plant onto you buttocks and start yowling and running around. Everyone would think it was funny, and the head movie guy would say, "Hey, let's put him in the movie."" - Jack Handey

"The name says it all. That's where Dad (Hades) tries out his new punishment ideas, but he says the traditional ones still work best: the lava flows, the minefields full of exploding surprises, burning at the stake, running naked through cactus patches... You name it, we've got it here - Nico di Angelo" - Rick Riordan

"You can't see anything from a car; you've got to get out of the goddamn contraption and walk, better yet crawl, on hands and knees, over the sandstone and through the thornbrush and cactus. When traces of blood begin to mark your trail, you'll see something, maybe." - Edward Abbey

"We welcome folks in Cactus Center if they've got an honest lay; If their game ain't too durn crooked, we never stop the play; But a get-rich-quicker blew in, with a game we did n't like, So we did n't waste the minutes in invitin' him to hike." - Arthur Chapman

"There was a product on late night TV that you could attach to your garden hose - "You can water your hard-to-reach plants with this." Who would make their plants hard to reach? That seems so very mean. I know you need water, but I'm going to make you hard to reach. "Think like a cactus!"" - Mitch Hedberg

"Is' that why you have that gun mounted on the front? Or is it for other reasons, because I would"ve thought that a man with your powers would be past the urge to compensate." Barabas grinned. "I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus," Saiman said dryly. "Thank you for reminding me." "Always happy to oblige." - Ilona Andrews

"She was elusive. She was today. She was tomorrow. She was the faintest scent of a cactus flower, the flitting shadow of an elf owl. We did not know what to make of her. In our minds we tried to pin her to a cork board like a butterfly, but the pin merely went through and away she flew." - Jerry Spinelli

"When I write "paradise" I mean not only apple trees and golden women but also scorpions and tarantulas and flies, rattlesnakes and Gila monsters, sandstorms, volcanoes and earthquakes, bacteria and bear, cactus, yucca, bladderweed, ocotillo and mesquite, flash floods and quicksand, and yes - disease and death and the rotting of flesh." - Edward Abbey

"It is only the story...that saves our progeny from blundering like blind beggars into the spikes of the cactus fence.The story is our escort;without it,we are blind.Does the blind man own his escort?No,neither do we the story;rather,it is the story that owns us." - Chinua Achebe

"A creative person has to create. It doesn't really matter what you create. If such a dancer wanted to go out and build the cactus gardens where he could, in Mexico, let him do that, but something that is creative has to go on." - Katherine Dunham

"My dad is like a cactus - introverted and tough. I'm a people person, like my mom, but I got my competitiveness from my dad. He came to this country from Belarus with nothing and built a real business. He's my hero for giving me that need to run a business and for having enormous confidence in me." - Gary Vaynerchuk

"Key West is the place where your sickly house plant back in New York grows to 10 ft. It's also the place where an 8-ft. cactus, the century plant, produces a huge yellow flower every great once in a while, like a robot proffering a bouquet. After the plant flowers, it dies." - Edmund White

"Very often, people are obsessed with what others think of them. It's like if a flower wants to be a cactus or a palm but it's not. A flower is a flower, and that's enough. That's all you have to do is be a flower." - Stjepan Hauser

"My father was Abe Burrows, who was a Broadway legend. 'Guys and Dolls,' 'How to Succeed,' 'Cactus Flower,' '40 Karats,' 'Can-Can,' 'Happy Hunting,' 'Reclining Figure,' it goes on. He was a legend, and when I was growing up, I was Abe Burrows' kid. That was my self-esteem." - James Burrows

"In Mexico, when we want to speak deep secrets, we drink pulgue together. It is a drink made from the cactus plant, and when you take the bottle from your mouth, it leaves a string behind, between the mouth and the bottle, like a spider's web. It shows that the truth sticks inside." - Alejandro Jodorowsky

"The canyon country does not always inspire love. To many it appears barren, hostile, repellent - a fearsome mostly waterless land of rock and heat, sand dunes and quicksand, cactus, thornbrush, scorpion, rattlesnake, and agaraphobic distances. To those who see our land in that manner, the best reply is, yes, you are right, it is a dangerous and terrible place. Enter at your own risk. Carry water. Avoid the noonday sun. Try to ignore the vultures. Pray frequently." - Edward Abbey

"What are plants doing? What are plants all about? They serve human beings by being decorative, but what is it from its own point of view? It's using up air; it's using up energy. It's really not doing anything except being ornamental. And yet here's this whole vegetable world, cactus plants, trees, roses, tulips, and edible vegetables, like cabbages, celery, lettuce - they're all doing this dance." - Alan Watts

"That cactus went right through my eye. It left my eye flat. They took me to a doctor, and he said, 'We'll have to take the eye out.' ...I fought like a tiger. I said, 'No! Leave the eye alone. I am sure it will grow back.' The doctor said, 'You're too young to know.' ...But in a year's time that fluid came back, and that eye is just as good as the other one today." - Bernard Jensen

"'Frogs' came because of another obscure movie I did called... well, the title when we shot it was 'Cactus.' It was released as 'Molly And Lawless John,' and it was a Western with Vera Miles. The greatest thing about that movie was, one day, John Ford showed up on the set just to see Vera. And I got to spend some time with John Ford. That was huge." - Sam Elliott

"I'm erased. I'm gone. I'm nothing. And then the world is free to flow into me like water into an empty bowl.... And... I see. I hear. But not with eyes and ears. I'm not outside my world anymore, and I'm not really inside it either. The thing is, there's no difference between me and the universe. The boundary is gone. I am it and it is me. I am a stone, a cactus thorn. I am rain. I like that most of all, being rain." - Jerry Spinelli

"I'm erased. I'm gone. I'm nothing. And then the world is free to flow into me like water into an empty bowl.... And... I see. I hear. But not with eyes and ears. I'm not outside my world anymore, and I'm not really inside it either. The thing is, there's no difference between me and the universe. The boundary is gone. I am it and it is me. I am a stone, a cactus thorn. I am rain. I like that most of all, being rain." - Jerry Spinelli

"My advice for someone who wants to be creative but has a chronic illness is to think of something that you can do as opposed to all the things you can't do - and do that. It's just like gardening: What can grow in this soil? There's some soil you can grow roses in and some soil you can only grow cactuses in, so if you can only grow cactuses, become the best cactus grower in the whole world. Taking care of yourself is the most important thing. Find something that makes you happy. Don't get down on yourself that you can't run a 4K or dance all night long at a fun club. Give yourself a break." - Kathleen Hanna



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