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Best Wife Quotes


"My wife (Maria) is the best reason to come home." - Arnold Schwarzenegger

"Problems reconciling mom and the wife are difficult in the best of times." - Natalie Dormer

"Our prejudices are our mistresses; reason is at best our wife, very often heard indeed, but seldom minded." - Lord Chesterfield

"Surely a gentle sister is the second best gift to a man; and it is first in point of occurrence; for the wife comes after." - Herman Melville

"For my wife and I, the challenge is to not make every day the best day possible because it's not realistic." - Steve Carell

"Man's best possession is a sympathetic wife." - Euripides

"I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend and my best friend is my wife. Who could ask for anything more?" - John Lennon

"Wife: a former sweetheart." - H L Mencken

"I expect that [trying to do the best] of my players today and of my kids. My wife says I shouldn't expect that of my children, but I don't think that's asking too much." - Frank Robinson

"Actually the best thing I did was to get thrown out by my wife. She's living with a fitness instructor. He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. He's an idiot." - Steve Coogan

"A man's best friend is a good wife." - Thomas A Edison

"A man's best friend is a good wife." - Thomas A Edison

"A good wife and health is a mans best wealth." - Proverbs

"A man's best fortune, or his worst, is his wife." - Thomas Fuller

"Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best." - Kin Hubbard

"My wife gives good headache." - Rodney Dangerfield

"My wife is my best friend, by far my best friend." - Charlie Daniels

"A young pregnant wife has been hospitalized for a simple attack of appendicitis. The doctors had to apply ice to her stomach and when the treatments ended the doctors suggested that she abort the child, they told her it was the 'best solution' because the baby would be born with some disability but the young brave wife decided not to abort, and the child was born. That woman was my Mother and I was the child." - Andrea Bocelli

"The best friend will probably acquire the best wife, because a good marriage is founded on the talent for friendship." - Friedrich Nietzsche

"I have the best husband a wife could possibly have. He's the best father my children could have." - Vera Farmiga

"The best piece of advice I received before I got married was, "Be careful what you say when you're in a fight, because it could stick in someone's head." I don't think I've ever said anything I really regretted. I'm very sympathetic to women. I've really studied wife-ology, and I know you've got to figure out the feelings. Deal with the feelings." - Jerry Seinfeld

"We are manipulated by fear and the fear of others, and how we're often manipulated into doing things and voting in ways that are against our own best interest. Look at healthcare. People will tell you that healthcare is socialism and communism, and they're doing this while their wife needs an operation and their kid needs braces." - Paul Haggis

"He that hath wife and children hath given hostages to fortune; for they are impediments to great enterprises, either of virtue or mischief. Certainly the best works and of greatest merit for the public have proceeded from the unmarried or childless men, which both in affection and means have married and endowed the public." - Francis Bacon

"The best thing ever is when some guy in his 50s taps me on the shoulder and says, 'I just want to let you know I hate my job, I hate my wife, and I come home and I watch reruns of your show and it's the only half hour of the day when I laugh and I forget how miserable life is." - Danny Masterson

"I don't care how much money he (Frank Viola) makes. He can have my locker, I'll take him to all the best restaurants and show him New York. He can even have my wife, but he can't have my number, no way." - Dwight Gooden

"It is best for ordinary men to have only one wife !" - Akbar

"One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife." - Groucho Marx

"The best thing I ever saw was a man who loved his wife." - Paul Mccartney

"My wife is not my best sexual partner, but she's good with the housework." - Jean-Claude Van Damme

"My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him." - Henny Youngman

"And yet of all the home remedies, A good wife and mother is still the best." - Kin Hubbard

"I will admit the best sex I've ever had has been with my wife." - Anthony Anderson

"A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest." - Proverbs

"Item, I give unto my wife my second best bed with the furniture." - William Shakespeare

"My wife Margaret is the best thing that's ever happened to me." - Ryne Sandberg

"The bottom line is, you love your wife, you do your best with that." - Sean Penn

"The best thrill is standing on stage and playing - other than being married to my wife." - John Tesh

"My wife, the star I steer by." - David Mccullough

"My wife drives a couple of Cadillacs." - Mitt Romney

"He was screaming like my wife." - Mike Tyson

"Golf is tougher than my first wife." - Ken Green

"I'm not witch. I'm your wife." - William Goldman

"Be my wife, all my life." - Jodi Thomas

"Like your job. Love your wife." - John Candy

"Caesar's wife should be above suspicion." - John Langhorne

"The husband provides direction; the wife, maintenance." - Myles Munroe

"I misled people, including even my wife" - William J Clinton

"It's so childish, greatest country in the world. It's like saying, I have the best wife in the world. Not just the one best suited for me, the best wife in the world. And if you could have my wife, you'd kill your wife." - Bill Maher

"I don't think so. Anyways, I don't spend money. My wife spends money...sorry wife." - Mikhail Grabovski

"Gorillaz virtually changed my wife...sorry, I mean,, actually, it was my wife." - Terry Gilliam

"[And on going from character to leading actor] I don't approach anything differently; I just approach it as a character. I'm always astounded at the fact that I've ever played a leading character in anything [Laughs]. And my wife concurs with that, frankly. She always thought I would be, at best, the wacky neighbor on a sitcom, so this is all just a surprise and a joy." - Steve Carell

"The best time for marriage will be towards thirty, for as the younger times are unfit, either to choose or to govern a wife and family, so, if thou stay long, thou shalt hardly see the education of thy children, who, being left to strangers, are in effect lost; and better were it to be unborn than ill-bred; for thereby thy posterity shall either perish, or remain a shame to thy name." - Walter Raleigh

"What is the most profitable? Fellowship with the good. What is the worst thing in the world? The society of evil men. What is the greatest loss? Failure in one's duty. Where is the greatest peace? In truth and righteousness. Who is the hero? The man who subdues his senses. Who is the best beloved? The faithful wife. What is wealth? Knowledge. What is the most perfect happiness? Staying at home." - Bhartrhari

"A thrifty housewife is better than a great income. A good wife and health are a man's best wealth." - Charles Spurgeon

"For every marriage then is best in tune, When that the wife is May, the husband June." - Rowland Watkyns

"She's best friends with my wife. (Julian) Gracie? You're married to Gracie? That was you? You're Mr. Hot Bottom! (Sunshine)" - Sherrilyn Kenyon

"The best kind of kinky sex is to have kinky sex with your wife or husband, the person you love" - Frank Langella

"Of earth's goods, the best is a good wife; a bad, the bitterest curse of human life." - Simonides of Ceos

"She's best friends with my wife. (Julian) Gracie? You're married to Gracie? That was you? You're Mr. Hot Bottom! (Sunshine)" - Sherrilyn Kenyon

"I remember being married to John Barry and trying to be the best wife in the world." - Jane Birkin

"The second wife [Trudi Bernstein] - the best part of that union, our two daughters, and that lasted about five years." - Nat Hentoff

"... to my inexpressible happiness, she is my wife, and truly best part, without a single tinge of my defects" - Ignatius Sancho

"The clog of all pleasure, the luggage of life, Is the best can be said for a very good wife." - John Wilmot, 2nd Earl of Rochester

"Two days are the best of a man's wedded life, The days when he marries and buries his wife." - Hipponax

"The best kind of kinky sex is to have kinky sex with your wife or husband, the person you love." - Frank Langella

"Our prejudices are our mistresses; reason is at best our wife, very often heard indeed, but seldom minded." - Philip Stanhope 4th Earl

"The clog of all pleasure, the luggage of life, is the best can be said for a very good wife." - John Wilmot

"I like working. That's when I'm feeling my best. And the people around me know that. My wife knows that." - Clint Eastwood

"The best thing in the world [is] a strong house held in serenity where man and wife agree." - Homer

"The best friend is likely to acquire the best wife, because a good marriage is based on the talent for friendship." - Friedrich Nietzsche

"If I honour my needs first, I will be the best wife, the best mum, the best sister, the best friend. I have to come first, because then everyone benefits." - Gisele Bundchen

"My first wife didn't like to fly, either." - Gordon Baxter

"Wife-Mother-Actress-Author The world will remember." - Eve Arden

"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it." - Winston Churchill

"I see 'Ahab's Wife' as offering an alternative vision to" - Moby

"Man and wife, Coupled together for the sake of strife." - Charles Churchill

"Do not desire your neighbor's wife in vain." - Julian Tuwim

"He that takes not up a pin, slights his wife." - George Herbert

"Hee that hath a wife and children wants not businesse." - George Herbert

"Hee that tells his wife newes is but newly married." - George Herbert

"I just keep pinching myself that that's my wife." - Orlando Bloom

"I watch a romcom only when my wife drags me" - Emraan Hashmi

"To my wife 'I told you I was sick'." - Lou Holtz

"The wife is the key of the house." - George Herbert

"It needs a cold wife to prompt lechery." - Elizabeth Proctor

"Man and wife, being two, are one in love." - William Shakespeare

"I want my next girlfriend to be my wife." - Daniel Matsunaga

"Procreative power & priesthood power are shared by husband & wife" - M Russell Ballard

"A virtuous wife commands her husband by obeying him." - Publilius Syrus

"I lost 150 lbs. if you include my wife." - David Feherty

"Forty percent of my ideas came from my wife." - Mike Royer

"I only fear God, and my wife - sometimes." - Lech Walesa

"Several girlfriends are easier to handle than one wife." - Hugh Hefner

"I'm giving serious thought into eating yor wife" - Hannibal Lecter" - Thomas Harris

"If I was your wife Sir, I'd poison you! Madam, if you were my wife, I'd let you!" - Winston Churchill

"Eccentricity may be diverting, Mama, but it is out of place in a wife: certainly in my wife!" - Georgette Heyer

"Let the husband render to his wife the affection owed her, and likewise also the wife to her husband." - Paul the Apostle

"Most people tell you they want to get out of kindergarten, but don't believe them. Don't believe them! All they want you to do is to mend their broken toys. "Give me back my wife. Give me back my job. Give me back my money. Give me back my reputation, my success." This is what they want; they want their toys replaced. That's all. Even the best psychologist will tell you that, that people don't really want to be cured. What they want is relief; a cure is painful." - Anthony De Mello

"One of the best records I've ever heard. Seriously, maybe top 20 all-time... I think if Rich Mullins had been given more time here, and if God had blessed his life with love and a wife, if he had the chance to see as much of the relational beauty as he saw of the natural beauty, I think he might have written some songs like the ones we find on BiRDS OF RELOCATiON. And you know that's about the highest praise I can give someone. You will not find a combination of more beautiful poetry, raw honesty, and gorgeous melodies for a long time." - Todd Agnew

"Possibly the best suggestion in condensed form, as to how to live, was given by my old Headmaster, Dr. Haig Brown, in 1904, when he wrote his Recipe for Old Age. A diet moderate and spare, Freedom from base financial care, Abundant work and little leisure, A love of duty more than pleasure, An even and contented mind In charity with all mankind, Some thoughts too sacred for display In the broad light of common day, A peaceful home, a loving wife, Children, who are a crown of life; These lengthen out the years of man Beyond the Psalmist's narrow span." - Robert Baden-Powell

"As his wife has been given to man as his best half, so night is the half of life, and by far the better part of life." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"My best chosen friend, companion, guide, to walk through life, Linked hand-in-hand, two equal, loving friends, true husband and true wife." - Charles Gavan Duffy

"The best thing a girl can be is a good wife and mother. It is a girl's highest calling. I hope I am ready." - Nancy E. Turner

"It started with a simple ring, You became husband and wife, You progressed to being parents And you're still best friends for life." - John Walter Bratton

"If ye loved him, he must ha' been a good man.' 'Yes, he...was.' 'Then I shall do my best to honor his spirit by serving his wife." - Diana Gabaldon

"I caught my wife in bed with my best friend the other day. I was crushed. They could have waited till I'd got out." - Emo Philips

"I take pride in my life-my wife, my family. I try my best not to have football define the person that I am." - Troy Polamalu

"I have the best wife and six wonderful children. And I'm proud to report that my future will always be bright with the family that I have." - Jim Harbaugh

"I wake up to my three dogs and my wife in bed and the kids, and those are the best gifts that I have." - Mike Ness

"I don't like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex." - Adam Carolla

"The greatest source of inspiration for me has been my wife; she is the love of my life, my best friend, and my most ardent supporter." - Sebastian Roche

"My husband and my children inspire me on a daily basis to be the best wife, mom, and woman I can be." - Candace Cameron

"I'm pathologically incapable of making decisions. Just ask my wife how long it took me to propose - on second thought, best not to bring it up." - John Grogan

"I don't have a bunch of mates. I don't have a man cave. My wife and I, we are each other's best friend." - Corbin Bernsen

"It's important my daughters learn from the hard work my wife and I put into this company. Who better to look out for your best interests than family?" - Do Won Chang

"My daily schedule is quite hectic, but I have to put my health first in order to be the best mom and wife I can be." - Ellen Pompeo

"My wife used to tell me one of my best qualities was that my feet don't smell, but I remember my brother's did when we were kids." - Jack Prelutsky

"With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me." - Rodney Dangerfield

"My wife is one of the best wimin on this Continent, altho' she isn't always gentle as a lamb with mint sauce." - Charles Farrar Browne

"I am a professional photographer because it is the best way I know to earn the money I require to take care of my wife and children." - Irving Penn

"I'm a huge David Wain fan. He's one of my best friends now, but he just makes me laugh continually, much to the annoyance of his wife." - Paul Rudd

"The government that governs best, governs best!" - Jon Stewart

"Surpass the best to be the best" - Eiichiro Oda

"They say that dog is man's best friend, and I think it's true. My dog does a lot of the same stuff my best friend does, like drool on my couch, mooch my food and hump my wife." - Brad Wilkerson

"I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend, and my best friend's my wife. Who could ask for anything more?" - John Lennon

"I want to be the best daughter and wife and friend and person I can be. And I want to help empower the people around me to be the best they can be." - Chelsea Clinton

"When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way." - Henny Youngman

"A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life." - Woody Allen

"She's my wife, not my girlfriend. Maybe for her it is better. For me, she's still the same girl, just my wife" - Nikolay Davydenko

"I enjoy going back and forth between plays and novels. It`s like having a wife and a mistress. Books are the wife; plays, the mistress." - Stephen King

"Who letts his wife goe to every feast, and his horse drinke at every water, shall neither have good wife nor good horse." - George Herbert

"Sharon Stone has the kind of face I'd leave my wife for. Since I'm not married, I'll have to leave someone else's wife." - Buck Henry

"I believe that because I had obtained a wife who was made up of wife-signs (beauty, charm, softness, perfume, cookery) I had found love." - Donald Barthelme

"Whatever is... is best." - Ella Wheeler Wilcox

"Best practices usually aren't." - Christopher Locke

"The best leaders are the best notetakers, best askers, and best learners." - Tom Peters

"The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him." - Oscar Wilde

"To avoid mistakes and regrets, always consult your wife before engaging in a flirtation." - E W Howe

"A man's wife has more power over him than the state has." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"No man should have a secret from his wife. She invariably finds it out." - Oscar Wilde

"My wife made me join a bridge club... I jump off next Tuesday." - Rodney Dangerfield

"A good one iron shot is about as easy to come by as an understanding wife." - Dan Jenkins

"Every time I see you naked, I feel sorry for your wife." - Jaromir Jagr

"My former wife made me a millionaire. I used to have three million dollars." - Bobby Hull

"A wife loves out of duty, and duty leads to constraint, and constraint kills desire." - Jean Giraudoux

"I got a horse for my wife. I thought it was a fair swap." - Bob Monkhouse

"He took his misfortune like a man - he blamed it on his wife." - Bob Phillips

"My wife ain't gonna make love to me if I got no money!" - Eddie Murphy

"My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat." - Henny Youngman

"The new-come stepmother hates the children born to a first wife." - Euripides



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