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Bachelor Quotes

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"The Adventure of the Noble Bachelor" - Arthur Conan Doyle

"A bachelor is only half a man" - Louisa Lawson

"Wisely, I say, I am a bachelor." - William Shakespeare

"Bachelor parties are for the married guys." - Chrissy Teigen

"Bachelor parties are for the married guys." - Christine Teigen

"I declare that I am a bachelor." - Julian Eltinge

"A bachelor, in my opinion, is only half alive." - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

"Every man is a bachelor out of his wife's sight!" - Margaret Way

"I don't think I'm destined to be the eternal bachelor." - Jesse Metcalfe

"Marrying an old bachelor is like buying second-hand furniture." - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

"Shall I never see a bachelor of three score again?" - William Shakespeare

"Marrying an old bachelor is like buying second-hand furniture." - H Jackson Brown Jr

"In my bachelor days, the priority wasn't learning to cook." - Rob Lowe

"I have a Bachelor in medicine, a Bachelor in surgery, and I am a Fellow of the Royal College of Surgeons." - Hasnat Khan

"A Bachelor of Arts is one who makes love to a lot of women, and yet has the art to remain a bachelor." - Helen Rowland

"A married man has many cares, but a bachelor no pleasures." - Samuel Johnson

"A bachelor lives like a king and dies like a beggar." - L. S. Lowry

"A bachelor is a man who comes to work each morning from a different direction." - Sholem Aleichem

"A politician ought to be born a foundling and remain a bachelor." - Claudia Johnson

"Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin." - P. J. O'Rourke

"I don't recommend being a bachelor, but it helps if you want to write." - Nelson Algren

"No man that good-looking could be a bachelor. Life wasn't that kind." - Gaelen Foley

"Old Cob tucked away his bowl of stew with the predatory efficency of a lifetime bachelor." - Patrick Rothfuss

"It's terrible feeling like an eligible bachelor but no women seeming to agree with you." - Pete Townshend

"There's only one secret to bachelor cooking- not caring how it tastes." - P. J. O'Rourke

"Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie." - Anonymous

"A bachelor is a man who comes to work each morning from a different direction." - Sholom Aleichem

"A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once." - Phyllis Diller

"One bachelor is an irritation. Ten thousand bachelors are a war." - Orson Scott Card

"I'd trained at the University of Washington and had a Bachelor of Fine Arts in acting." - Gregg Henry

"Bachelor parties would pay a lot of money to hire Pat Buchanan to come." - Willie Geist

"Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor." - Lady Bird Johnson

"A politician ought to be born a foundling and remain a bachelor." - Lady Bird Johnson

"I actually got stabbed at my friend's bachelor party. In real life." - Johnny Knoxville

"I'd like to meet a nice girl and leave all those 'hottest bachelor' lists behind." - Jesse Metcalfe

"I haven't seen this many men dressed in women's clothing since my bachelor party" - Bruce Willis

"I'm a lifelong bachelor, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't marry the right woman." - Richard Roeper

"Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near." - Helen Rowland

"A bachelor is a man who never makes the same mistake once." - Ed Wynn

"There are some women whose pregnancy would make some sly bachelor smile." - Honore De Balzac

"Actually, I majored in marketing and I have a bachelor of science." - Wanda Sykes

"I'm probably the only member of the 'Bachelor' cast without an agent!" - Jake Pavelka

"I want to be the most eligible bachelor in New York City." - Andrej Pejic

"When people are on 'The Bachelor' it gives them the opportunity to put their best foot forward, especially when you're around the 'Bachelor' or the 'Bachelorette;' that one person who you're vying for attention with." - Jake Pavelka

"A married man is a man with a past, while a bachelor is a man with a future." - George Bernard Shaw

"If you wish the pick of men and women, take a good bachelor and a good wife." - Robert Louis Stevenson

"A bachelor has to have inspiration for making love to a woman, a married man needs only an excuse." - Helen Rowland

"... it is a fact universally acknowledged that a husband is the most ridiculous thing on earth, except for a bachelor." - Peter De Vries

"A bachelor gets tangled up with a lot of women in order to avoid getting tied up to one." - Helen Rowland

"A bachelor has to have an inspiration for making love to a woman-a married man needs only an excuse." - Helen Rowland

"Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You're not taking him to a strip club, are you?" - Stephenie Meyer

"Now that the Sanctity and Holiness of heterosexual marriage has been destroyed, are they going to cancel The Bachelor?" - Dana Gould

"A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance." - Earl Wilson

"When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married." - William Shakespeare

"I have a Bachelor of Arts in English, which means I had a lot of formal training in reading." - Kate Dicamillo

"My first speaking part was to read for John Forsythe for Bachelor Father. I was the lead, opposite him." - Linda Evans

"I am ashamed to admit I watch a lot of reality shows like The Osbournes and The Bachelor." - Sara Gilbert

"If you wish the pick of men and women, take a good bachelor and a good wife" - Robert Louis Stevenson

"Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever." - Helen Rowland

"A bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever." - Helen Rowland

"Hey 'Bachelor,' take notes! Trusting one another and sharing a journey to health leads to lasting relationships!" - Alison Sweeney

"Now on 'Bachelor Pad' it is true colors - no best foot forward anymore, everybody is really themselves." - Jake Pavelka

"I happen to hold a bachelor of science degree in geology... And my greatest contribution to the field of science is that I never entered it." - Colin Powell

"As a walled town is more worthier than a village, so is the forehead of a married man more honorable than the bare brow of a bachelor." - William Shakespeare

"Danbury wasnt a prison, it was a crime school. I went in with a Bachelor of marijuana, came out with a Doctorate of cocaine." - George Jung

"He took her up in his arms in the way of a bachelor who has had amateur experience of the carrying of nieces." - William Pett Ridge

"The world must be peopled. When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married." - William Shakespeare

"A bachelor May thrive by observation on a little, A single life's no burthen: but to draw In yokes is chargeable, and will require A double maintenance." - John Ford (dramatist)

"It is impossible to believe that the same God who permitted His own son to die a bachelor regards celibacy as an actual sin." - H L Mencken

"There is no character in the comedy of human life more difficult to play well than that of an old bachelor." - Washington Irving

"During a long and varied career as a bachelor, I have noticed that marriage is the death of politeness between a man and a woman." - Arnold Bennett

"You know how funerals are not for the dead, they're for the living? Bachelor parties are not for the groom, they're for the uncommitted." - Bill Murray

"You know how funerals are not for the dead, they"re for the living? Bachelor parties are not for the groom, they"re for the uncommitted." - Bill Murray

"The trouble with marriage is that, while every woman is at heart a mother, every man is at heart a bachelor." - E V Lucas

"It is quite beneath the dignity of a person holding a Bachelor of Arts degree to engage in such a vulgar occupation as the writing of novels." - Fukuzawa Yukichi

"The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything. Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin." - P. J. O'Rourke

"I had rather be a pot-bellied seed cucumber, flung carelessly on a wood pile to ripen, than to be an old bachelor." - Josh Billings

"A bachelor May thrive by observation, on a little. A single life's no burden: but to draw In yokes is chargeable, and will require A double maintenance." - John Ford (dramatist)

"A good-natured woman...which is as much as you can expect from a friend's wife, whom you got acquainted with a bachelor." - Charles Lamb

"I didn't know how it was to be a bachelor. I never felt like one. I think it's a mental state." - Riteish Deshmukh

"Loving an old bachelor is always a no-win situation, and you come to terms with that early on, or you go away." - Jean Harris

"Do not let your bachelor ways crystallize so that you can't soften them when you come to have a wife and a family of your own." - Rutherford B Hayes

"When I was a bachelor with a different girl on my arm every week, people didn't think I was quite legitimate." - David H Koch

"As soon as I check into a hotel, I get butt naked and I watch super trash TV like 'Storage Wars' and 'The Bachelor.'" - Mary Lambert

"A bachelor May thrive by observation on a little, A single life's no burthen: but to draw In yokes is chargeable, and will require A double maintenance." - John Ford

"Telling lies is a fault in a boy, an art in a lover, an accomplishment in a bachelor, and second-nature in a married man." - Helen Rowland

"On both 'The Bachelor' and 'The Bachelorette,' it seems like proposing marriage is equivalent to saying, 'Let's date.' Everyone knows those aren't the same things." - Patti Stanger

"The notion of the single man began in the 1950's. The idea of the bachelor as a separate life was new and obscure." - Hugh Hefner

"I've never been a manipulator, even in my bachelor days. I never wanted to do things to people that could catch up with me later on." - Matthew Mcconaughey

"What I've learned from fatherhood is that having a son cannot, did not, change my love for The Bachelor! I thought that having a son would make me grow up when it came to my TV viewing habits, but I love The Bachelor even more after having a child." - Jason Biggs

"What business has an old bachelor like that to marry?' said Sir James. 'He has one foot in the grave.' 'He means to draw it out again, I suppose." - George Eliot

"A reader seldom peruses a book with pleasure until he knows whether the writer of it be a black man or a fair man, of a mild or choleric disposition, married or a bachelor." - Joseph Addison

"It is common knowledge to every schoolboy and even every Bachelor of Arts, That all sin is divided into two parts. One kind of sin is called a sin of commission, and that is very important" - Ogden Nash

"James Bond in his Sean Connery days ... was the first well-known bachelor on the American scene who was not a drifter or a degenerate and did not eat out of cans." - Barbara Ehrenreich

"Jesus was a bachelor and never lived with a woman. Surely living with a woman is one of the most difficult things a man has to do, and he never did it." - James Joyce

"A good bachelor drinks his dessert (and sometimes the rest of his meals). A sweet tooth is a danger signal that you're getting too much exercise and not enough cocktails." - P. J. O'Rourke

"Bachelor parties are designed for those who are sad to see the passing of their single days. I couldn't be more eager to have mine behind me. So there's really no point." - Stephenie Meyer

"Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed, he might just as well get married." - Groucho Marx

"You mentioned your name as if I should recognize it, but beyond the obvious facts that you are a bachelor, a solicitor, a freemason, and an asthmatic, I know nothing whatever about you." - Arthur Conan Doyle

"The happy married man dies in good stile at home, surrounded by his weeping wife and children. The old bachelor don't die at all - he sort of rots away, like a pollywog's tail." - Charles Farrar Browne

"Bachelor parties are designed for those who are sad to see the passing of their single days. I could' be more eager to have mine behind me. So there's really no point." - Stephenie Meyer

"I congratulate NUS for launching a new degree, a bachelor of environmental studies. This is a most timely initiative. One of the biggest challenges facing Asia is to reconcile Asia's rapid economic development with care for the environment." - Tommy Koh

"Marriage is like retiring as a bachelor and getting a sexual pension. You don't have to work for the sex any more, but you only get 65% as much." - Aristotle

"I don't much like to think that being a bachelor girl limits how you see the world. On the other hand, I know it certainly limits how the world sees you." - Wendy Wasserstein

"The evening before my departure for Blithedale, I was returning to my bachelor-apartments, after attending the wonderful exhibition of the Veiled Lady, when an elderly-man of rather shabby appearance met me in an obscure part of the street." - Nathaniel Hawthorne

"I started in a business background, but then it was like, 'you know, I can't do math,' so I changed it to a liberal arts degree and got my Bachelor of Arts in Communications and it made sense." - Jeff Dunham

"How confusing the beams from memory's lamp are; One day a bachelor, the next a grampa. What is the secret of the trick? How did I get so old so quick?" - Ogden Nash

"The happy married man dies in good stile at home, surrounded by his weeping wife and children. The old bachelor don't die at all - he sort of rots away, like a pollywog's tail." - Charles Farrar Browne

"Massachusetts became the first state to marry gay couples, though lawmakers say allowing gay couples to get married raises a lot of questions. You know, such as: does that best man invite both guys to the bachelor party?" - Jay Leno

"My kids have never known me not working on The Bachelor. But they've lived in Paris and Italy and been to Hawaii and Bora-Bora with me, and it's incredible to me that they've had these experiences." - Chris Harrison

"He was himself a homeless bachelor with a past, much in debt, and nothing gave more pleasure than to envy his friends their wives and comforts and to speak of them intimately and disparagingly." - Dylan Thomas

"Mr. Augustus Minns was a bachelor, of about forty as he said - of about eight-and-forty as his friends said. He was always exceedingly clean, precise, and tidy: perhaps somewhat priggish, and the most retiring man in the world." - Charles Dickens

"If that's the eye of the law, the law is a bachelor; and the worst I wish the law is, that his eye may be opened by experience - by experience." - Oliver

"You mentioned your name as if I should recognise it, but beyond the obvious facts that you are a bachelor, a solicitor, a Freemason and an asthmatic, I know nothing whatsoever about you." - Arthur Conan Doyle

"When a man has seen the woman whom he would have chosen if he had intended to marry speedily, his remaining a bachelor will usually depend on her resolution rather than on his." - George Eliot

"Russia's Vladimir Putin appeared in public for the first time after a mysterious 10-day absence. Putin said it took him that long to recover from the finale of 'The Bachelor.'" - Conan O'Brien

"I've never necessarily chosen to be a bachelor. I've had girlfriends throughout the last 20 or 30 years. It's just that there were times when I met people that fascinated me and times I didn't." - Adam Clayton

"Before I got married, I never really watched TV. Now, my husband and I watch 'The Bachelor' together. I love 'The Soup' - that's where I get a lot of my pop culture - and 'Chelsea Lately.'" - Dylan Lauren

"I'm a bachelor in the old sense of the word, meaning I flirt, I have very many close relationships, but then I come home and like to read my book." - William Ivey Long

"Throughout any given season of 'The Bachelor,' the women exclaim that the experience is like a fairy tale. They suffer the machinations of reality television, pursuing - along with several other women, often inebriated - the promise of happily ever after." - Roxane Gay

"Before I got married, I never really watched TV. Now, my husband and I watch 'The Bachelor' together. I love 'The Soup' - that's where I get a lot of my pop culture - and 'Chelsea Lately." - Dylan Lauren

"I will only think of settling down after Salman Khan, the other most eligible bachelor, plans to settle down. We are eligible bachelors, but he's the rock star, so let him get married first; then I'll think about myself." - Yuvraj Singh

"Music pulled me like a gravitational force. I entered college as a physics major but left as a Bachelor of Music, a degree with the same practical application as, say, one in the History of Chinese Poetry." - Marshall Brickman

"I don't know that I came across as being real competitive on 'The Bachelor,' although maybe I did a little bit on 'Dancing with the Stars.' I am a born competitor. The bigger the challenge the better!" - Jake Pavelka

"As a rule, you see, I'm not lugged into Family Rows. On the occasions when Aunt is calling Aunt like mastodons bellowing across premieval swamps and Uncle James's letter about Cousin Mabel's peculiar behaviour is being shot round the family circle ('Please read this carefully and send it on Jane') the clan has a tendency to ignore me. It's one of the advantages I get from being a bachelor - and, according to my nearest and dearest, practically a half-witted bachelor at that." - P G Wodehouse

"What a world of trouble those who never marry escape! There are many happy matches, it is true, and sometimes "my dear," and "my love" come from the heart; but what sensible bachelor, rejoicing in his freedom and years of discretion, will run the tremendous risk?" - Mark Twain

"He quietly groaned. Again and again, he'd witnessed this phenomenon with his friends. They got married. They were happy in that sated, grateful way of infrequently pleasured men with a now-steady source of coitus. Then they went about crowing as if they'd invented the institution of matrimony and stood to earn a profit for every bachelor they could convert." - Tessa Dare

"Here is the full list of the banned words I used: active homosexual; career women; Third World; blacks; Asians; Australasia; Bangalore; primitive African tribes; crippled; in a wheelchair; hare lip; ethnic minorities; handicapped; spinster; committed suicide; gypsies; Bombay; illegitimate daughter; air hostess; Siamese twins; Calcutta; deaf ears; illegal asylum seeker; province of Northern Ireland; grandmother; bachelor." - Rod Liddle

"In April 1917 the illusion of isolation was destroyed, America came to the end of innocence, and of the exuberant freedom of bachelor independence. That the responsibilities of world power have not made us happier is no surprise. To help ourselves manage them, we have replaced the illusion of isolation with a new illusion of omnipotence." - Barbara Tuchman

"He quietly groaned. Again and again, he"d witnessed this phenomenon with his friends. They got married. They were happy in that sated, grateful way of infrequently pleasured men with a now-steady source of coitus. Then they went about crowing as if they"d invented the institution of matrimony and stood to earn a profit for every bachelor they could convert." - Tessa Dare

"It was inspiring to learn of the new Bachelor of Environmental Studies Program, and I congratulate you for it. Singapore is geographically in the right central position for an influence in Asia and Australia, and NUS has the reputation and academic strength to make it effective." - E O Wilson

"After all, wedlock is the natural state of man. A bachelor is not a complete human being. He is like the odd half of a pair of scissors, which has not yet found its fellow, and therefore is not even half so useful as they might be together." - Benjamin Franklin

"I want to date Cheryl Cole. She is a looker, she's the one. I love her accent, its so sexy. She's free and I'm still a bachelor. That girl is so beautiful, Ill treat her well. I'm thinking weddings one day, why not? Just think of the kids. I'm getting ahead of myself here, I haven't even met the girl." - Chace Crawford

"I take a ridiculous pleasure in what I eat and drink. It comes partly from being a bachelor, but mostly from a habit of taking a lot of trouble over details. It's very persnickety and old-maidish really, but then when I'm working I generally have to eat my meals alone and it makes them more interesting when one takes trouble." - Ian Fleming

"You know, people say that today. "I am a saved sinner." That is like saying you are a married bachelor. That is like saying you are an honest thief, or a pure harlot. you can't be a saved sinner. You are either saved or you are a sinner. He came. "Thou shalt call his name Jesus. He shall save his people from their sins."" - Leonard Ravenhill

"This is a timely and relevant initiative. The environmental challenges facing Singapore and the region are becoming more complex. Tackling them will require inter-disciplinary approaches combined with a good understanding of science, economics and governance aspects. The NUS Bachelor of Environment programme will fill a much needed gap in the current framework. NEA is pleased to be a partner to this programme." - Andrew Tan

"The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything. Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin. The next best vegetable is the jalapeno pepper. It has the virtue of turning salads into practical jokes." - P. J. O'Rourke

"Bachelors know all about parties. In fact, a good bachelor is a living, breathing party all by himself. At least that is what my girlfriend said when she found the gin bottles under the couch. I believe her exact words were, "You're a disgusting, drunken mess." And that's a good description of a party, if it's done right." - P. J. O'Rourke

"Besides the things I asked [Indira Gandhi], she told me about her son Rajiv, who is married to an Italian girl and is a pilot for Air India, then of her younger son Sanjay, who is an automobile designer and still a bachelor." - Oriana Fallaci

"I haven't had a chance to pick up a good book in a long time, because I've been either reading scripts or learning them or writing them. And so, by the time the day is done, I usually just want to click on The Bachelor and fall asleep. But I gravitate toward biographies and things like that." - Justin Theroux

"It is common knowledge to every schoolboy and even every Bachelor of Arts, That all sin is divided into two parts. One kind of sin is called a sin of commission, and that is very important And it is what you are doing when you are doing something you ortant..." - Ogden Nash

"[Responding to being told that the law supposes a wife acts under a husband's direction:] 'If the law supposes that,' said Mr. Bumble,... 'the law is a ass-a idiot. If that's the eye of the law, the law's a bachelor; and the worst I wish the law is, that his eye may be opened by experience- by experience." - Charles Dickens

"We can't do without dominating others or being served.... Even the man on the bottom rung still has his wife, or his child. If he's a bachelor, his dog. The essential thing, in sum, is being able to get angry without the other person being able to answer back." - Albert Camus

"Times are changed with him who marries; there are no more by-path meadows, where you may innocently linger, but the road lies long and straight and dusty to the grave. Idleness, which is often becoming and even wise in the bachelor, begins to wear a different aspect when you have a wife to support." - Robert Louis Stevenson

"It's too bad that there aren't as many light comedies around in the movies as there were when I was making pictures like 'The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer.' The boys are just not writing them. Many writers are more serious now than they used to be, and that's showing up in all phases of entertainment." - Rudy Vallee

"My grandma and my mom are not happy about the fact that I am still a bachelor. It's not on my mind that I have to find the person I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. It will happen the way it's going to happen." - Maksim Chmerkovskiy

"I just like the company of beautiful women. I have a weakness in that department. And I suppose because I am fairly well off and a famous musician, I'm up for grabs. And that makes me an eligible bachelor in the press." - Eric Clapton

"In my bachelor days, I had a small upright piano in my kitchen. It cost 10 from eBay plus 70 delivery. It was because I'd seen an old photo of Tom Waits - with dirty dishes, empty bottles, a hot plate, a coffee machine and a piano strewn with lyric sheets - and fallen in love with it." - Jamie Cullum

"I was just on the edge of getting married, and I was frenzied at the prospect of this great step in my life after having been a bachelor for so long. And I really wanted to take my mind off of the agony, and so I decided to sit down and write a book." - Ian Fleming

"I don't trust novels with points, do you? If a novel is only about a point, the writer should just say it in as few words as possible so we can take it in and go back to watching 'The Bachelor' on television." - William Lashner



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Bachelor, Bachelor of Arts, Bachelor Party,